THINGS WE LEARNED...RNA CONFERENCE 2012

Things we learned on the Roadtrip to the RNA Conference

By Ruth Long, Denise Deegan, Jane Travers & Sally Clements

Ferry companies should not have a staircase reminiscent of the Titanic on their ships, nor should they show documentaries about exploring shipwrecks. Or have safety videos that seem to have been made by the same people as Money for Nothing by Dire Straits.

It is possible to eat your body weight in free mini pastries on the ferry.

Four Irish women in a car soon revert to stereotypes of parents & kids.

Wales does not exist in the rain. It is all grey. And invisible.

While some people discuss folklore, mythology and legends in the front of the car, some people throw jelly babies about in the back.

It is possible to eat your body weight in jelly babies.

The magic of an RNA conference means the moment we reached the Lake District the sun came out. And it was GORGEOUS.

Ruth and Jane work well together as navigator and driver, right up until the moment they arrive at the campus when they promptly argue about which entrance to use. They were both right!

Our reputations preceded us. (Oops! Blame Twitter. And the Roadtrip)

Do not mention anything unmentionable to Jane Lovering just before she gives a speech (Kate Johnson).

On Friday night we were the quiet kitchen. This had to be amended.

Ruth still believes we were the quiet kitchen on Friday night. Shh, don't tell.

The Sun always Shines on TV, and at an RNA conference. (Well, not always, but more than for the rest of the summer)

We don’t want another 50 shades of Grey conversation.

We are easily confused/bewildered/amused.

Jane Lovering can bring Jane Travers to the verge of an athsma attack in under a minute.

Ms Alison Maynard has a little cup.

On Saturday night we were NOT the quiet kitchen.

It is possible to drink your own body weight in wine. Though perhaps not wise.

It may not be possible to get up the next morning. Not all the way up.

There is a beautiful garden in Newton Rigg. With WICKERMEN in it. It is probably best that we didn’t discover this until we were about to go and were under time constraints.

Be careful when purchasing pasties. Very careful.

Wales is pretty in sunshine. And there. Which was nice as that’s where we were getting our ferry from. Phew.

No one is allowed to say “Nothing can go wrong now” until all the way home. ALL THE WAY HOME. And then some.

It is possible to eat your body weight in free cheese and crackers on the ferry.

The RNA Conference itself... we learned SO MUCH. And were awed by the kindness, generosity, friendliness and intelligence of everyone there. Thank you all so much. We will be back. (If this sounds like a threat... oops).

Alison Maynard on the RNA Conference 2012 Gala Dinner

The social side of the RNA conference is a big part of the appeal. We go to learn. We go to get updates on industry trends, but we also go to relax and spend time with like-minded people who will admire our pretty shoes. For those of us married to sensible engineers, any comment on our shoes that doesn’t start, “Don’t you already have some like that?” is particularly appreciated.

Saturday night’s Gala dinner is the big opportunity to glam up, get your tanned bits out (fake-tanned this year obviously), drink some wine, eat some food and just have fun. For me, this year’s Gala dinner turned into a particularly fabulous night, because my short story, Feel the Fear, was announced as the winner of the Elizabeth Goudge Trophy. I started hyperventilating as soon as my story was announced as one of the top three. Fortunately, the people on my table were kind enough to remind me to breathe, and I was able to collect the award without fainting in amazement or falling off my heels.

The night after that is a cheery blur. There were lots of congratulations. There was quiet marvelling at the names, the proper grown-up writer names, already engraved on the Elizabeth Goudge cup. There was at least one moment of being made (forced, absolutely and completely against my will) to drink champagne. There was discussion about whether the champagne would taste better if I drank it out of the Elizabeth Goudge cup. But more than anything else there were new friends, genuinely chuffed to be there for someone else’s happy moment, with no jealousy or resentment, but lots of laughs and encouragement and pretty pretty shoes.

Editor Note: I couldn't resist posting these photos of Alison...her delight should be bottled!

RNA Conference 2011 - Ruth Long Talks About Refilling The Cup

Alison Maynard, Talli Roland, Ruth Long

Yesterday I confessed to my Weight Watcher’s leader that this week wouldn’t be a very good one.

I hung my head and said “I was away at a writers’ conference in Wales” and she smiled, added the extra pounds to my record and asked “Are you a writer?”

A question which always makes me beam with joy.

“Yes. I was at the Romantic Novelists' Association Annual Conference.”

“Good,” she said. “You were refilling the cup.”

The long weekend away (starting with a fairly panicky discovery that the bus stop for the airport coach was no longer the bus stop for the airport coach, running up the road to suspected location of new bus stop, to have the bus driver say calmly “I would have stopped for you”, kindly without adding “mad panicking lady”... ahem...) was a chance to get away without being the person with the full time job who writes in the evening, and away from being wife and mother (much as I adore my family). It was time to be me without being responsible for anyone else at all. For many of us, I think, to have a few days where you can just be a writer, and spend that time in the company of other writers is beyond value.

On Friday morning, following the goodie-bag stuffing circuit, we visited the Roman Legion museum and if there are a large number of Roman Britain set novels next year, it’s not entirely my fault for instigating the trip – the ladies from Mira mentioned Romans too. We had a lovely lunch in the Priory during which the waiters told us (thanks to Kate Johnson’s fantastic t-shirt) that they were delighted to see what a Romantic Novelists looks like. We pointed out there were seven of us. They ran away. It rained and rained but we didn’t care.

There were so many lightbulb moments for me over the weekend I couldn’t hope to account for them all here.

The description workshop, the regency prints, the pitch/angle talk... But above all one of the great things about this conference is the social aspect. No, not just the wine. (Although there was wine). There was also the opportunity to support friends going into pitches, to chat about the voices-in-head phenomenon without people’s eyes glazing over while they reach for the phone to dial 999, and the opportunity to generally hang out and have fun.

There was as mentioned above more than one opportunity to drink wine, laugh a lot, and keep my sci-fi spurs by knowing about the Orgasmatron in Barbarella in the quiz. And to enjoy the bewildered and slightly terrified expression of every one of the male cyclists also staying at Caerleon campus as they walked into the bar and saw us all there. Bless them, they even tried turning up the volume on the TVs so they could hear. Aww...

Lisa Bodenham and Kate Johnson

A few people have mentioned the bar being closed before the gala dinner, but no one has touched on the sheer Night-of-the-Living-Dead-ness of it all when the security staff were back there, trying to turn on the TVs rather than open the bar and we all surged forwards en mass. One of my flatmates (she knows who she is) said “These heels are pretty sharp. I reckon I could batter my way through the metal shutters if necessary”
.

Ah, romance novelists. The newspapers really have no idea. J

So after a few “Oh my God, it’s 4am”‘s in the naughty kitchen, a hangover to rival any I’ve had before, and a four hour wait at an airport, what do I take away from the Conference this year?

The sure and certain knowledge that my cup of inspiration, friendship, celebration and the sheer joy of spending time with other writers is not only refilled, it’s positively brimming over.

R.F. Long always had a thing for fantasy, romance and ancient mysteries. The combination was bound to cause trouble. In university she studied English Literature, History of Religions and Celtic Civilisation, which just compounded the problem. She writes fantasy (The Scroll Thief, Songs of the Wolf) and paranormal romance (Soul Fire) or whatever else the voices tell her to.

Her dark contemporary YA fantasy The Treachery of Beautiful Things will be available from Dial Books for Young Readers in August 2012.

Her website is www.rflong.com and she can be found on Twitter as @RFLong.

She works in a library of rare and unusual books. But they don’t talk to her that often. Or she’s learning to ignore them.